Wednesday, 13 February 2013

Wommen Quotes

Rich widows are the only secondhand goods that sell at first-class prices.
{Attributed to Benjamin Franklin}

An incautious congressman playfully ran his hand over Nick's shiny scalp and commented, ''It feels just like my wife's backside. ''Nick instantly repeated the gesture. ''So it does,'' he replied.
{Nicholas Longworth}

A man likes his wife to be just clever enough to comprehend his cleverness, and just stupid enough to admire it.
{Istael Zangwill}

If Perticuliar care and attention is not paid to the Ladies we are determined to foment a Rebelion, and will not hold ourselves bound by any Laws in which we have no voice, or Representation.
{Abigail Adams}

Next to god, we are indebted to women, first for life itself, and then for making it worth having.
{C. Nestell Bovee}

On one issue, at least, men and women agree; they both distrust women.
{H. L. Mencken}

Patience makes a woman beautiful in middle age.
{Attributed to Ellior Paul}

One should never trust a woman who tells one her real age. A woman who would tell one that would tell one anything.
{Oscar Wilde}

If a woman has to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant's life, she will choose to save the infant's life without even considering if there are men on base.
{Dave Barry}

Women like silent men. They think they're listening.
{Marcel Achard, quote, 4 November 1956}

Sure God created man before woman. But then you always make a rough draft before the final masterpiece.
{Author Unknown}

Some men know that a light touch of the tongue, running from a woman's toes to her ears, lingering in the softest way possible in various places in between, given often enough and sincerely enough, would add immeasurably to world peace.
{Marianne Williamson, ''A Woman's Wurth''}

Women cannot complain about men anymore until they start getting better taste in them.
{Bill Maher}

A male gynecologist is like an auto mechanic who has never owned a car.
{Carrie Snow}

You start out happy that you have no hips or boobs. All of a sudden you get them, and it feels sloppy. Then just when you start liking them, they start drooping.
{Cindy Crawford}

Every girl should use what Mother Nature gave her before father time takes it away.
{Laurence J. Peter}

The average woman would rather have beauty than brains, because the average man can see better than he can think.
{Author Unknown}

A woman can say more in a sigh than a man can say in a sermon.
{Arnold Haultain}

Whatever women do they must do twice as well as men to be thought half as good. Luckily, this is not difficult.
{Charlotte Whitton}

The two women exchanged the kind of glance women use when no knife is handy.
{Ellery Queen}

Curve; The loveliest distance between two points.
{Mae West}

Can you imagine a world without men? No crime and lots of happy fat women.
{Nicole Hollander}

Women get the last word in every argument. Anything a man says after that is the beginning of a new argument.
{Author Unknown}

Next to the wound, what women make best is the bandage.
{Jules Barbey d'Aurevilly}

The rarest thing in the world is a women who is pleased with photographs of herself.
{Elizabeth Metcalf}

A man's face is his autobiography. A women's face is her work of fiction.
{Oscar Wilde}

There's something luxurious about having a girl light your cigarette. In fact, I got married once on account of that.
{Harold Robbins}

The most popular image of the female despite the exigencies of the clothing trade is all boobs and buttocks, a hallucinating sequence of parabolas and bulges.
{Germaine Greer}

Whether they give or refuse, it delights women just the same to have been asked.

Howiver, I'm not deny in' the women are foolish; God Almighty made 'em to match the men.
{George Eliot, ''The Harvest Supper,'' Adam Bede}

Women are like elephants to me. I like to look at them, but I wouldn't want to own one.
{W.C. Fields}

Women really do rule the world. They just haven't figured it out yet. When they do, and they will, we're all in big big trouble.
{''Doctor'' Leon of drleons}

Ah, women. They make the highs higher and the lows more frequent.
{Author Unknown}

I expect Woman will be the last thing civilized by Man.
{George Meredith}

Men who don't like girls with brains don't like girls.
{Mignon McLaughlin, The second Neurotic's Notebook, 1966}

Women keep a special corner of their hearts for sins they have never committed.
{Cornelia Otis Skinner}

Lovely female shapes are terrible complicators of the difficulties and dangers of this carthly life, especially for their owners.
{George du Maurier}

Every woman is wrong until she cries, and then she is right instantly;
{Sam Slick (Thomas Chandler Haliburton)}

Men have been trained and conditioned by women, not unlike the way Pavlov conditioned his dogs, into becoming their slaves. As compensation for their labours men are given periodic use of a woman's vagina.
{Esther Vilar}

The essence of life is the smile of round female bottoms, under the shadow of cosmic boredom.
{Guy de Maupassant}

I have an idea that the phrase ''weaker sex'' was coined by some woman to disarm some man she was preparing to overwhelm.
{Ogden Nash}

When men reach their sixties and retire, they go to pieces. Women go right on cooking.
{Gail Sheehy}

The torment that so many young women know, bound hand and foot by love and motherhood, without having forgotten their former dreams.
{Simone de Beauvoir}

They call it PMS because Mad Cod Disease was already taken.
{Author Unknown}

Be to her virtues very kind, Be to her faults a little blind.
{Matthew Prior}

They may talk of a comet, or a burning mountain, or some such begatelle; but to me a modest woman, dressed out in all her finery, is the most tremendous object of the whole creation.
{Oliver Goldsmith}

A highbrow is a man who has found something more interesting than women.
{Edgar Wallace]

It upsets women to be, or not to be, stared at hungrily.
{Mignon McLaughlin, The Neurotic's Notebook, 1960}


Women Quotes 

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