Wednesday, 19 February 2014

Funny Jokes in Urdu

Funny Jokes in Urdu


Pehla femi mery pait mein dard ho raha hai
Jaa kar mery liye sir dard ki goli lay aoo.
Dusra femi Yaar mera bazo tut gya hai
Mein kasy ja  sakta hun nasir sy kaho lay aye
Nasir magar yaar mein tu gounga hun
Mein dukan par jaa kar kya kaho ga.
 
Aik sahib ka ghora achnak istanbal say chori ho gya
Khbar pori basti mein jungal ki aag ki traha pahel gai
In sahib kay ghir kay bahir kafi log jama ho gaye
Ye sabhi log afsos ka izhar kar rahy thay
Lekin in sahib kay chehray par khushi kay asar nnumiya thay
Akhir in sahib say kisi nay poch hi liya kay
Aap ka ghora chori ho gya hai
Our aap hai kay magmom hony kay bajy boht
Khush nazar aa rahy hai akhir baat kya hai
Wo sahib bolay  upar waly ka yehi karam kuch kam hai
Kay is ghoray par swar nhn tha
Warna  mein bhi isi ghoray kay sath sath
Chori ho kar chala gya hota.
Aik sahib hath mein packet liye ja rahy tay
Raste mein aik dost mila
In kay hath mein packet dakh kar bolay
Miya rizwan kya liye ja rahy ho?
Rizwan ny kaha aj bivi ki salgirah hai
unhno ny farmish ki hai kay gift mein ya tu
Sonay ka har do ya phir refrigerator
Dost tu yaar refrigerator lay letey
Fadiye mein rehtay
Rizwan kya karo yaar boht koshish ki magr
Naqli refrigerator mila hi nhn
Mali bagh mein aik larkay ko aam tortay hwe dekh kar
Aray tum yaha kya kar rahy ho
Larka aap kay kuch aam gir gaye thay
inhen utha kar drkhat mein latka raha hun.
Aik orat jo bari achi kahtib thi
Aik jalsay mein taqrer kar rahi thi
Taqrer ka mazo orat ki bartri tha
Taqrer karty karty wo josh mein aa kar boli
Mein pochti hun in mardo say ager orat
Na hoti tu wo kaha hotay?
Pechey say bulan awaz ayi janat mein
Aik sahib apne dost to bata ray thay
Mein aik dafa nilaam ghar mein gya tha
Our mein nay aik inaam bhi jeeta tha
Dost lekin tum say kon sa swal pocha gya tha?
Mujh say pocha gya tha kay bali ki kitni legs hoti hai?
Mein nay jwab diya 3
Kamal hai bali ki tu 4 legs hoti hai
Thumary jawab ko drust kasy maan liya gya
Dost bola wo sahib kehne lagy
Asal mein drust jawab kay qareb treen mera jawab tha
Is liye drust qarar day diya gya.
Husband gari say utra tu is ki wife ny istaqbal kiya
Husband nay kaha
Bagam maff karna mein thumare liye
Wo bandar nhn lya jis ka wada kiya tha
Bivi nay kaha
Koi baat nhn tum tu aa gaye ho na
Wife ny husband say kaha
Dakho ji aap mujhy mery naam
Say kyun bulnay lagy ho?
Ye sun husband ny kaha
Tu kya mein thumen mama kah kar pakro?
Aik shakhs apne dost say tum tu keh rahy thay
Kay bali ko kehin dur jngal mein chor ao gay
Magar ye tu mujhy yehi nazar aa rahi hai?
Dost kehny laga haan mein ise jungal mein chor tu aya tha
Magar khud rasta bhol gya
Isi liye wapis ghar any kay liye mujy bali
Kay peche ana para
Do dost apis mein batien kar rahy the
Pehla mery bate nay tap position li hai
Dusra lekin thumra beta tu keh raha tha
Kay mein fail ho gya hun
Pehla wo tu thik hai is ny drsal fail hony walo mein
Tap position li hai.
Gahik dukan dar say tum tol mein kami kar rahy ho
Lekin yyad rakho
Qaymat kay din mera hath ho ga thumra garibyan ho ga
Dukan dar koi baat nhn
Mein isi din kapray hi nhn pahno ga.
Master sahib wo konsi cheez hai
Jo insan ko fresh say arash taq lay jati hai
Sagrid ny jawab diya janab mout ka frishta.
Kanjus aadmi ny nokar say kaha
Jao mein ny thumen wo behnas di
Jo pechlay saal mar gai thi
Kanjus ki bivi is say zyada kanjus thi
Wo kehnay lagi isy wo ghora bhi kyun nhn
day dety jo pechley saal gum ho gya tha
Aik dost dusray dost say tum nay apni bivi
Ko krusi kyun mari?
Dusra dost bola sofa boht bhari tha.
Aik roz aik wazer sahib pagal khany kay doray par thay
Isi duran kisi khas zurart say inhe apne office phone krna para
Number milny mein daer hui moth pees qareeb hi tha
Wazer sahib gusay say opreter say bolay ..............
Jante ho mein kon bol raha hun
Dusari traf say opreter ki awaz ayi........
Mein ye tu nhn janta kay app kon sahib bol rahy hai
Albata itna zurar janta hun kay aap pagal khane say bol rahy hai.
 

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